What is Mindfulness?

How many of us have a set routine in our lives? How many times do we plan to plan? And how many of us get upset when things do not go our way? 

Do not feel bad, I bet the majority of the population is on the same boat! It is so common to rush through life and focus ONLY on our goals and our plans for the future. I can recall the amount of times I put all my efforts on a specific goal and once it's achieved I move to the next one. Now, did I take a moment and enjoy my achievement? Did I sit there and allowed myself to truly take in what I just achieved? The answer is...NO! You see, we are wired to thrive and to conquer. However, it takes a lot more work to sit still and take it all in. It takes less work to go through a divorce process than to allow ourselves to mourn the loss. To be mindful of our emotions sometimes can feel like trying to live under the water. Some of us rather believe we are strong and tapping into emotions is seen as a sign of weakness. In reality, all it takes is a bit of mindfulness to live a better (less stressful) life.

What is mindfulness? According to Psychology Today, it is a state of active attention to the present. When you are mindful you are consciously aware of your present thoughts, feelings and your surroundings. There are tons of resources on the web regarding mindfulness including stress management techniques, integrative medicine and meditation. Practicing mindfulness is something that does not require much. It can be incorporated in your regular activities. Mindfulness is a state of mind. It is allowing yourself to take a moment and live in the present. Living in the present means to be aware of your surroundings, how you are currently feeling, body language and thoughts.

Life is stressful and we can easily get lost in our routines. So why not try something new. Let's take a moment and be mindful. If you are a planner then schedule a session of some mindfulness!!!!

Fitness Tips: Working Mother

Every where you look you see and read how important it is to eat healthy, exercise, spend time with your family, self care and maintaining the marriage happy. Sounds extremely overwhelming if you ask me!!!! I will be honest with you, being a full time working mother and wife AND accomplishing all these MUST do sounds completely insane and impossible to do. But I am trying my absolute best to accomplish as much as I can. In search f tips I found a very good article about fitness for working mothers.

The article states that the minimum requirement for healthy fitness is 20 minutes 3x a week!!! I was very pleased to know that because hours at the gym is just too hard right now. 

Some of the things they suggest are as follows: 

1. Make fitness a priority and put in your calendar like any other appointments. Instead of eating lunch out take 20 minutes and walk around. You can eat a light lunch that day, walk and then go back to work. 

2. Get your family involved. Take a family walk after dinner or ride bicycles. If you have a pool then go swimming! This will allow you to get your workout and spend some quality time with your family. 

3. If it has been a long time since you worked out then pace yourself and work yourself up to the 20 minutes. 

I hope you found these tips useful. For more information and other articles visit childdevelopmentinfo.com. 

Dealing with Self Esteem and Confidence

Have you ever heard of the phrase "love others like you love yourself"? It is actually a bible verse if you must know....

However, loving yourself is a bit harder (for some people) than to love others! Dealing with low self esteem and self confidence is a hard task! I see how others do it with such ease but not me!!!! I struggle every day of my life with this issue. My sister jokes around with me because every year, around my birthday, I always tell her it's time for a new look! I MEAN every single year lol. People get tired of their wardrobe, I get tired of myself. It is super easy to change the wardrobe but not yourself. 

The sad part of my struggle is that it's completely mental! I get compliments constantly about my looks and I don't know how to accept them. It makes me feel so weird and undeserving. I want to accept it deep inside but I just can't. I have a career and completed a master's degree and I am pretty good at what I do. Sounds like I have reasons to have self confidence right? Well, nope. I struggle with that as well!!!! I always doubt myself and second guess my decisions. It is a never ending nightmare. If you have experienced this, then you know what I am talking about. The worse part about this nightmare is not so much how or why you feel this way. It is how your loved ones treat this issue!!! They get extremely impatient with you and short tempered. They treat you like if you mean to be this way!!!! HELLO!!!! I dont want to be this way which is why it's a daily struggle, thank you! Ugh!!!!!

As a new mom, having this "new" body is a bigger hit to my self esteem. I do agree it is completely worth it and yes I will do it again! After all, my body is not the problem is my self deception! 

Even though it is a daily struggle I do not let this get the best of me!!! I actively try everyday to beat this inner issue... If I do not fight it daily I will be defeated and you would find me moping around, with pajamas in complete darkness in my house!!  Just like a dragon in the dungeon! 

Here are a few things I have tried daily. Keep in mind I do not do all these things in one day. Also, I take the approach of daily goals. I am a busy mom, wife and prifessional so I can only handle this in a daily basis. Besides, remember I told you it's a daily struggle for me.....

To learn how to love yourself practice the 5 languages of love in yourself. The 5 languages are:

Words of affirmation: praise yourself in something simple you accomplished. Even if it's laundry after a complicated day.

Quality time: do something you like to do by yourself. You don't have to go away from home (it's good if you do! Kids find you anywhere). Make sure it's something that makes you feel good! Ex. Gym, girls night, bubble path, pampering, massage, etc.

Gifts: head to your favorite store and buy yourself an outfit that fits you good!!!! Even if you are trying to loose weight! Or buy yourself jewelry, shoes, purse or whatever!!!! 

Acts of service: do something that makes you feel good. It can be for yourself or others as long as it makes you feel special and accomplished.

Physical touch: go for a massage or indulge in a spa! It's filled with appropriate touching!!!! 

The Waiting Game

Have you ever heard the phrase "great things happen to those who wait"? Very common phrase in my walk of life!!!! However, it doesn't matter how many times I hear it... I still get impatient. It feels like putting a cake in front of you and saying "don't eat it!"!!!! Like, really?!?!? Lol

Playing the waiting game is never fun but life has taught me that the moment you loose your cool and jump the gun, it turns sour. So I was forced to learn how to wait and not be impatient. At the end, when I look back I usually say, "oh I see why now".... Patience is something you learn and it's not part of you. The way you learn patience is never fun or favorable. It's usually full of mistakes and bad decisions. Here are some tips on how to play the waiting game:

1. Define your goals: be very specific with your goals! If it's a job then make sure you include the environment you want, location , salary etc. If it's a partner then write down specific traits you want and so on.

2. Be patient: we all struggle with this one but try your best to be patient! 

3. Set mini goals: achieving mini goals is easier than a big one. Set up some little goals to accomplish what you want while you are waiting for it! Think of it as a big puzzle and work on a piece at a time.

4. Redirect your focus: there are other things in life than that ONE thing you are waiting for. Take a break and do other things that will bring you some fulfillment in any area of your life. 

5. Don't forget: we can't control everything in life. Sometimes things happen for a reason. Although you might not like the reasons, it is always good to remember that we don't know it all. Trust in things you can't control and don't be so hard on your yourself!

Life Behind the Curtain

Have you ever looked a someone's life and said to yourself: "I wish I can have a life like that"?

Facebook and Twitter is full of perfect lives, no issues, peaches and cream relationships and awesome jobs! In the social media everyone has a perfect life. Well, I am here to tell you that life behind the curtains is very different than on stage!!! That person you admire the most does have their own share of struggles. That friend that is always happy and perky could go home and cry herself to sleep. That loving mother hugging her child and in a playful mood might be struggling with depression and anxiety. What about your cousin who just got blessed with a bundle of joy after years of trying? She "looks" so happy with her baby but at home she can't stop crying!!!

Sometimes we tend to judge others from the outside and from what we can see- their life stage. There is more to a person than what you see! Always ask yourself, how is life behind the curtains. 

My life on stage: Beautiful family with a new baby and a handsome husband. Living in a great city with great people. Outgoing and friendly personality with positive advice to anyone looking for it. Always laughing and making jokes.I look like I just got it altogether huh?!?!

My life behind the curtain: A new mom struggling with balancing her new life. Always trying to please and bring happiness to others. A mom who had a rough time with postpartum depression and loneliness. Who couldn't understand why she didn't want to take care of her precious baby...confused between joy and guilt....experienced the high demand of breastfeeding when her body couldn't do it. A wife who struggled with full happiness in her marriage not knowing how much her husband DID understand. A girl that felt she had no one to talk to when surrounded with great people but living 2000 miles away from all family members....not have the ability and comfort of a hug from her own mother nor the comforting company of her siblings nor the sweet smiles of her nieces and nephew. A "pretty" girl who constantly battles self esteem and self worth.....who's mirror image was distorted and kind words from her husband wasn't sufficient. A person who's life experiences took her ability to dream again therefor planning for the future became a struggle. This is Me behind the curtains!!!

I have learned that without pain there is no gain!!! Nothing in life is for granted. And nothing in life is perfect. Perfection is what YOU want it to be. My definition of a perfect life does not look like yours and that is OK!!! I love my life and even though my life behind the curtain may sound "bad" to some.. to me it's perfect! I appreciate life more and I am able to be real and relate to others. 

Everyone is a real life celebrity in a way (without the fortune) lol. We all have an audience to impress whether is friends, professors, family, partners, etc. We all have a life stage. 

There is nothing wrong with a life stage. We can be as "real" as we can be but there is always something behind the curtains that only selective people may know. Just remember that everyone else does too. So be careful how you treat others and what you do to others. Always keep in mind that, just like you, they too have a life behind the curtains. 

Fashion Tip: Glam on a Budget

Here I go again!!! I will not stop emphasizing that I do not need to break my bank to look good and to pamper myself!!! I am forever looking and searching for decent deals. "I can't afford  it" is slowly leaving my vocabulary.

So, my new tip for glam on a budget is GROUPON!!!! Awesome company, great customer service and hassle free which are my favorite phrases. Just in case (which I doubt) you didn't know, groupon is a website and app that shows deals I mean DEALS from your nearby places. The deals range from dining to traveling!!! They differ every day and sometimes totally worth it!! Living Social does the same thing if you want to check them out. However I had a bad experience with their customer service therefore I rather groupon all the way. 

So why not stay up to date with all the fashion looks and all the pampering we need once in a while at an affordable price?????

I found a deal for a well reputable salon and was able to get haircut, style and treatment for $40!!!! Here in Denver just cuts range anywhere from $50 and up!!! So I saved 60% and look fab!!!! This particular place does your hair while you sip a good glass of wine and they have refills!!! Oh, did I forget to say its complimentary?!?! SCORE....

You too can enjoy deals like this and live a fab life without the fab cost!!!! What are you waiting for???? Go and hit up groupon.com....

Hairstyles For Moms

Just in case you didn't know, I love long hair! It took ,e forever to grow my hair to the length I wanted. My all time favorite hairstyles are from the Kardashians. Although, they usually always wear extensions, I still get my hair inspirations from them. So, when I was pregnant I was loving my luscious hair. THEN....ummm my hair took a turn to the worst lol. If you didn't know, your hair falls out in large quantities after birth. I thought it was not going to happen to me but 6 months later boom, it happened. Dreadfully, I started contemplating new hairstyles that are easy and practical for moms. I did my research and came across a great article from parentconnect.com. Here is what I found:

 High Pony: This style goes with ANY hair types. Ponytails get bad rep just because if not done right it could look messy. You can definitely pull off a classy and sleek ponytail and feel great instantly.

 The Headbands: There are so many different headband out there. They range from summery thick ones to classy thin ones! You can pull off different hairstyles with headbands. And of course your hair will be out of your face.

  The French Twist: This style is super cute! All you need is a couple of pins and voila, you are ready. The messy (easy) look works great when you are in a rush. Just remember to leave the front nice and sleek.

 The Bun: This style makes me laugh! Why? Well, my friends HATE to see me in a bun. It is not necessarily because buns are ugly. Instead, because I don't take my time to make them sleek. Buns can be very classy and fun. You can add chop sticks if you like.

The Low Side Pony: I have tried this one in different ways and I love it. I usually side part my hair and put in a low ponytail. I usually do a messy braid though. Pin the loose hair for a sleek look but don't be afraid to leave some loose strands.

The Scarf: Now that winter is gone, use those silk scarves as a hairpiece. It works great to pull your hair out of your face and be functional with your kids. Have some fun with different colors though. It will bring the fun side of you out!!!!!







I hope you enjoyed these fun tips. Feel free to YouTube these styles to learn how to do them step by step!!! I know I did.

Fitness Tip: Check your insurance

Quick tip: most insurances give you some type of wellness benefit. These companies are all about printing wellness in every aspect!

So my old insurance used to give me a discount on any gym. I used to pay $20 a month for 24 Hour Fitness.

My new insurance offers 2 programs:

1. They reimburse you $20 a month for the gym membership as long as you go 12 times a month.

2. They offer discounts on certain gyms or classes.

So, get on that phone and call your insurance and ask about wellness programs. Every penny counts when it comes to staying healthy and budgeting. 

Schedule, Schedule, Schedule

I realized that although we want to do much unless we organized ourselves and work on a schedule it would be nearly impossible to get things accomplished.

Today I had on my to do list to shop for a present to baby shower, a birthday present for my mother in law, post office run and attend the baby shower!
Seemed very simple to accomplish since I wake up at 7 am thanks to my 4 months old! Well, I was only able to get the baby shower present and go to the baby shower! I was so disappointed.

So, scheduling is very important! Make sure to add time for yourself, family and loved ones, and of course some playtime!!! Yeah I know it sounds impossible but I bet if we don't go back to bed (unless its a scheduled rest time) after the baby or kids wake us up then we have longer days and longer hours! I have a pretty good routine and schedule down for mornings and evenings with the baby! It took a while but consistency worked for us. I wake up at 30 mins before the baby just so I can shower and drink coffee, then once she is up I feed her and change her and let her play in my room while I get ready! Bedtime for her is 8 pm and ours is 9 pm so that gives us an hour for some alone time with each other!

My scheduling is not much and it is minimal but it makes time for me and my husband, play time and some sense of control... Making small changes and goals are more effective than big unrealistic goals!